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The Spacious Life Way: Letting Go of Control

8/14/2018

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Mamas, let’s talk a moment about staying calm when engaging with our precocious little (or not so little ones) I’ve gotten so good at this over the years that others often comment on it . It’s true really.
Last week I had an opportunity to practice😉. That’s me in the photo afterwards.
The group I was camping with was going to hike to a gorge and my youngest (7) didn’t want to go which would have meant the rest of us had to stay behind. To me that wasn’t really an option. So I listened deep. I didn’t try to talk her out of her feelings. I repeated her words. You really don’t want to go on this hike. I kept my emotions in check. We brainstormed options and ended up having someone drive us to the trailhead so the hike wouldn’t be so long. We packed yummy snacks and planned for ice cream at the camp store afterwards.

I let her feel heard and have choices even if she still had to go on the hike. She loved it so much that we went back a second day 👊🏻💪🏻💕

The thing is we have to recognize is that we are not here to force our children to comply. Oh I know you may want to mold them and shape them but that’s not really our job. Let that sink in a moment.

We must see that our children are autonomous human beings with their own thoughts, feelings and opinions.

Emotionally intense and gifted kids have an incredibly strong need for freedom and choice. We must either find a way to make room for it or face a lifetime of struggle and resistance. It’s our choice.

Mamas, today I encourage you to look inward and work on yourself. Yes create a rhythm and flow to your days. Create family guidelines and goals. Then let go and work on being your best self . Be the mentor and example your children need.

Give your child as much freedom and control over their own life as you possibly can. Learn to manage your own anxiety, overwhelm, anger and fear. In doing so we are able to be more conscious and thoughtful in parenting these often highly demanding and exhausting children . Over time you too will be able to stay calm no matter how your children behave. You will be able to let go and support them into becoming who they are truly meant to become.
Trust the process mamas ❤️

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